As a feminist I cannot say that I have not given some thought to the question of chivalry being negative for women. But I can honestly say that I have never been offended when a guy opened a door for me. It simply isn't something that crosses my mind when I think about situations where a man is polite towards a woman.
When I think about it though it does make sense. When a man opens a door for a woman or pays for her dinner it may look like a sign of respect. However I can see how this could be seen as a power play. These actions put the man in a power of position within their interactions. As if the woman does not or should not have the opportunity to provide for herself. Furthermore this is only behavior that we support in men. If a woman were to take a chivalrous role on a date for instance, the man is encouraged to feel emasculated by such action. In this way society has made it only acceptable for men to be in the position of power in a relationship. I guess I would say this is an action of oppression if I thought it really still existed in the world. What I have experienced though is a decline in this sort of behavior as a whole. This example lies in the realm of courting and dating. But I rarely if ever see people "date" anymore. An age of technology has made us much more likely to electronically communicate with a significant other and see such a person in situations that do not involve chivalrous behavior.
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